..and asked something politely

I have lots of things to do. In this job market I have been reduced to a "office manager",which is ok by me- at least I have a job,right?

I have been noticing a lot of assfuckary and dumbassness when it comes to people on the phone.Therefore I have made these simple guidelines to follow if you ever call a professional setting-whether it be a lawyers office or a medical office.

1. Know why you're calling. Its imperative that when you pick up the phone you know the reason why you are calling for example: If calling a law firm for status,you can accurately tell the person picking up the phone why you are calling. It doesn't help the receptionist fields calls of dumbasses who say "status" yet their case is settled and they are waiting for a settlement check. If you are calling because of a letter or call from an attorney of professional,please have the letter or the message written down in front of you. And yes,at the bottom of every letter there is a name so there is no excuse.

2.Know who you are calling- I cannot tell you how many times people call the office and get transfer ed to me and they don't know who the hell their attorney is. Know what their name is,know who the paralegal is-its important. And no a conglomeration of the law/medical office name is not the name either.

3. Have patience. A lawsuit or medical testing takes time. You have to have some sort of patents. Leaving a message everyday is not going to make your case/testing go faster. Actually its going to annoy the attorney or doctor and delay the testing or lawsuit.

4. Learn how to leave messages.You don't know how many messages i have received where the client was arguing with some one in the back round re:people not picking up the phone and fails to leave a message OR a client leaves a message and fails to leave a number. Don't assume i have your new number.

5. Make sure you update me on any changes of address/phone. Dodging creditors,phones shut off? Always make sure someone has your alt numbers just in case we need to reach you. If you disappear,so does your case/file.

6. Questions are a good thing. If a person at the office asks you your name,don't be vague. We are asking questions only to help you-remember we are on your side and you called us.

7. Don't assume we speak another language- Its nice to know lots of people in the USA speak more then one language but if you call someone,don't assume they have someone who speaks your language. (and if you are reading and understand this then your a lying asshole) Please don't rattle of in x language unless you know that persons speaks it. Also would it kill you to ask: My name is "John Smith" i need a person who speaks "x language" please?


MOST IMPORTANTLY
8. Speak clear- You don't know how important this is. I don't mean speaking English-that's another issue entirely(see above). Get to a land line- cell phones will notoriously have shitty reception when you need them. Speak clearly. Don't mumble. Don't be high/drunk. Get to the point. Don't assume i am your friend and that you can rant about why the attorney doesn't call you or how shitty your life is. I have a job to do.



Drop your ego at the door. The world doesn't revolve around you. Some people get busy-don't be a pest. Take a fucking hint-if your attorney doesn't call you back,perhaps he doesn't want to speak with your ass. Perhaps the doctor hasn't gotten the results back. Perhaps your dress isn';t ready etc etc. And would it kill you to be pleasent?

And please follow the guidelines above or i am sending your ass to the general mailbox and it'll be lost or deleted.