I’m sick of Hipsters…I just didn’t realize I may be one of them

It all started several summers ago. I was sitting on my friends stoop in Cobble hill drinking Pabst Blue ribbon and we were listening to Yaz- No body’s diary. We were dressed as we saw fit- classic 80’s vintage from thrift stores we had searched all of New Jersey for. We were going to get drunk and then go into his house and watch Ingamar Bergman movies on his new flat screen hi def TV.

…That’s the summer I realized I could be a hipster.

You can recognize them anywhere- the girls will dress in pseudo vintage clothes they purchased from ebay or thrift stores and dress to the nines. Clothes of choice. Bad jeans, slouchy boots and hat, shirt that says some slogan and a nit cap. Accessories include an iphone and a out of place vest.And lots and lots of mismatched layers

The dudes all have crappy hair, porno facial hair and/or dreads,vest, skinny jeans,flannel and ofcourse Chucks….

…I have Chucks…this is so wrong…

Their favorite pastime is gentrifying ethnic neighborhoods and enjoying indy music and avant garde art.

Favorite foods- anything Indian or organic.

I realized my behavior was and IS killing my age group and I had to make it stop.

But then I realized a hipster rejects the mainstream and popular culture- but doesn’t this behavior a part of the mainstream and popular culture?

If everyone listen to indy music wouldn’t it not be indy anymore.

It’s a catch22 kind of thing.

But the irony is, the hipster, will spend their hard earned money and not understand the value of the investment.

Yes, you can spend top dollar on that shitty apartment

in that gang infested neighborhood but why do that when you can spend less money and move into a cheaper apt in a different neighborhood.

Yes, you can go to whole foods or wait on line outside Trader Joes in Union Square and buy certified organic at top dollar buy why don’t you go into the green market that is located right there and support the Farmer directly?

Also, the hipster cannot comprehend the significance of what they deem kitschy or nostalgic.

Example- PeeWee’s playhouse, when I was growing up was one of the coolest shows on TV. Now the Hipster is buying up the boxed set because it brings them back to their childhood- and not because it was a good TV show. Same thing with half their DVD library.

That’s another thing.

Don’t blame me when your East Williamsburg (aka BUSHWICK) apartment is broken into and your PS3,flat screen TV, Bose music center, Apple Imac etc is stolen. You were the one that decided to move in there in the first place.

In retrospect, I feel sorry for thinking myself as a hipster. I hate Indy Movies and Music,…the avant guarde is crap and I choose retro to NOT fit in.

My music collection represents 20 yrs of musical appreciation-from 80’s op to 90’s alternative to the Beatles and Johnny Cash- Each song speaks to me.

Not because its popular or lack there of.

I’m an individual: choosing to live on the border of what’s popular and what’s not. Its my choice if I wanna listen to Lady GaGa or Pink or fucking Ace Of Base.

My choice.

My choice to laugh at Hipsters because they are now the mainstream and their lack of understanding its irony.

My choice to understand ALL ethnicities ESPECIALLY those in my family.

My choice to understand the neighborhoods BEFORE they were gentrified. The Lower East Side is not for the taking- it belongs to the ghosts of the street cart pushers and the tenement houses and Ellis Island.